RP:He Killed Younglings: Part One

This is a Warrior's Guild RP.

Summary: The Adventures of Genderbent KhittiBrand continues! As if things couldn't get any weirder right now, they do during a Warrior's Guild mission in Xalious.

• He Killed Younglings
  
  • Rank: C
    
  • Suggested Complexity: Two to three RP sessions, preferably with a partner
    
  • Location: Xalious Mountain Range
    
  • Immediate Reward: 2500 gold
    
  • Description: A friendly monster rancher named Clyde returned home to his humble abode somewhere in Xalious Village to discover that his favorite litter of frost drake hatchlings have all had their heads bitten off. The marks on the victims indicate that a juvenile dragon, perhaps in a bid to mark its territory, committed the crime. Speak with Clyde for details (remember, you’re in charge of coming up with NPC banter unless I’m in the RP!) and then head out into the mountains to locate the dragon’s den and slay it in the name of lost youth.
  • Part Two can be found here.

The Apartment Above The Bakery, Cenril

Brand was so excited. Khitti was going to bring her along on one of his adventures, and Brand would finally get to show off some of what she’d been learning during all this time with Viera. But first… she needed to look the perfect combination of pretty and practical. She’d locked herself in the bathroom for the last hour, and was almost done with the finishing touches. Almoooooost… done. There. She had a face full of water- and sweat-resistant makeup, a fancy dress with detachable layers should any combat get too heated, her trusty set of high heel boots (though not so high that she caught up to Khitti in height, nor so pointed that she couldn’t run in them), and her favorite hairpin to keep her braided bun in place. Everything was -just- right. As she leaned forward against the sink to get a final look at her makeup, though, she was hit with a sudden and eerie sense of deja vu. She’d been here before, looking at herself and yet not herself. For that one moment she was sure of it, although she couldn’t say what that even meant or what it was she was supposed to do about it. And then she blinked, and the moment had passed and everything was right in her world. She blew herself a lipsticked kiss in the mirror, winked at her reflection, and then finally departed. Khitti would, no doubt, be waiting for her somewhat impatiently.

Khitti || “Braaaaaaaaaaaaand, it’s been five hours. What the heck are you doing in there?” Okay, so it’s not actually been five hours. Khitti smirked when his wife finally emerged from the bathroom. “It takes me ten minutes to do my hair and put on eyeliner.” Yes. Even Dude!Khitti wore eyeliner. “Did you have to bath in the blood of innocents again, dear? You need to tell me when you’re doing that, so I can join you. I’m not gonna stay this hot forever, you know.” He was joking. Mostly. Maybe. Would bathing in the blood of innocents really be all that bad? Especially if he wasn’t the one killing them? “We should go… Got a bit of a trip to Xalious. But first!” He picked Brand up and carried her into the bedroom. Look, Brand can’t come out of the bathroom looking like that and not expect to get her clothes ripped off. Khitti was polite about it though. There was not a hair out of place and nor her makeup smudged when her husband was done with her.

Khitti || Two hours later (and after a brief session of freshening up in the bathroom), the two left Cenril and eventually found themselves in the city that quite possibly had far too many mages. And now there were two more. “So, there’s some sort of “monster rancher” that lives here. Said he came home and his dragonlings had their heads bite off. Looked like a dragon a bit older than they were possibly. Marking its territory and all that,” Khitti said, helping Brand off her tikifhlee once Khitti was off of his own. “He frequents the Destrier, so we’re going to check there first.”

Brand || Despite the care Khitti took, Brand would need another twenty minutes in the bathroom to ‘freshen up’ before she was ready again. When she emerged from the bathroom the second time, she’d bat her eyes at her husband. “Only looking. No touching. Not unless you want to put this mission off ‘til tomorrow.” And she’d lead the way out the door, strutting just the way he loved to watch her go. They had important things to do, yes, but there was no reason she couldn’t set them up for a steamy round two when they got back to the house.

The Dancing Destrier, Xalious

Khitti || Keep your thoughts on the mission, Khitti. Not on Brand. And those lovely painted lips that were ripe for kissing. Or that long braid that can be undone with just a single pull of that hairpin and the strawberry scent that came from it all. Or that dress that doesn’t even technically need to come off. Or… Khitti was briefly distracted by his super hot wife. Why did she marry him? He’ll never know. “I… uh… Right. We should uh... we should go. For reasons. That I can’t remember at the moment.” Khitti then promptly turned on his boot heels and headed into the Dancing Destrier. It was like magic: once he stopped drooling over his wife, he recalled what they were there for. “Hi. Yes. Hello,” Khitti said to the nearest waitress once she was done with her table, “I was looking for someone named Clyde? Had some trouble with his youngling dragons?” The woman blinked at Khitti. “What? Is he still telling that story? Gods, it’s been weeks. Look, Clyde lost a drinking contest to some kid. The kid came in when Clyde was busy trying to get under some girl’s skirt and drank all ten tankards Clyde had lined up on the bar. It was -Yuenglings’- he lost. As in the brand. Not younglings. Beer. And lots of it. And then he stupidly challenged the kid to a contest and lost that too.” Khitti’s lips parted as if he were going to speak, but couldn’t. He was too dumbfounded by this.

Brand should have something witty to say to this, but she didn’t. She opened her mouth, closed it again, then turned to Khitti. When he had nothing to say either, she said the only thing she could think of: “Is it always like this? Tell me it isn’t always like this. Are there any other jobs we can do? A lost case of beer doesn’t sound worth our time...” Not that she was biased or anything, being more of a hard liquor girl than a beer or wine one.

Khitti considered things carefully. Okay, so there wasn’t an actual dragon. BUT! There was a certain priestess-in-training that could conjure one up… “No. We’re doing this. I had plans for that gold. Like taking my wife out for dinner at that fancy new restaurant in Rynvale she’s been wanting to go to. And maybe buying her a new dress for the date too.” Khitti put his super serious thinking face on and thought up a plan. “You need to try out your new abilities right? Well, you’re going to make a dragon,” he said. “Where’s Clyde at now? Need to take him with us. If he watches it die, things’ll probably go alright. He probably isn’t the type to want to mount a dragon head on his wall at home.” The waitress pointed off into the corner where a very drunk Clyde was seated in a booth, drinking himself to death. Khitti gave the waitress fingerguns as thanks and headed over to the table. Ever so smoothly, Khitti slid onto the booth’s seat on the opposite side of Clyde and waved. “Hi, Clyde. I hear you have a dragon problem.” Clyde was so sure that he did and the reminder of it prompted him to tell his tale. Again. With lots of hiccuping and slurring of words.

Brand could have swooned on the spot when she saw those finger guns. The charisma, it was irresistible! It was a miracle of self-control that she didn’t jump Khitti on the spot. Ahem. Trying to push impure thoughts out of her head, Brand listened carefully to Clyde’s description of the dragon, then concentrated on the spell Viera had taught her. When it was ready, she finally spoke up. “Wow, that sounds terrifying. It would be really unfortunate if your dragon managed to show up right… about… now.” On perfect cue, the ground shook and there was a roar from outside the tavern. Brand gasped dramatically, her painted lips round and wide. “Oh no! How could anyone have predicted it would show up right as we were talking about it?!”

Khitti did his best to hide a smirk. He tried so hard, but he couldn’t quite do it, to the point that he had to feign a brief coughing fit to mask it and a bit of laughter. Clyde, however, stared at the door after the “dragon” roared and yelled, “Not my younglings!” And then he ran outside. Because he’s a crazy drunk. “Damn it, Brand,” Khitti said once the drunk had left, but there was nothing disapproving in his tone. He loved it. Every bit of it. He nonchalantly pushed the table towards the other side of the booth, picked up his wife again (he had such a fascination with carrying her everywhere and she supposedly hated it, but dealt with it anyway), gave her one of those really sexy kisses, set her down again, and ran outside. The waitress just looked at Brand like wtf.

Khitti || Outside, Khitti had his hands on Clyde’s shoulders, the drunk panicking and sobbing as Khitti shook him repeatedly, “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THE DRAGON WAS THIS BIG?! WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE.” Khitti side-eyed the ground, totally calm again. “Unless…” Clyde stopped mostly freaking out, his eyes watery and snot bubbling out of his nose, “Unless…?” Khitti gave Clyde a solemn nod. “Unless… you pay me--I mean the Warrior’s Guild--three times as much as the original offer. Clyde gasped. Khitti solemnly nodded again. “My poor wife and I have a child to feed. Do you know how many pancakes that kid eats? And how expensive maple syrup is? I can’t go back home without money. He’ll set our home on fire again. He’s only four and we’re on our tenth house already.” Khitti covered his face to hide the faux shame. Clyde was moved to tears. The dedication that they for their child! It was like the dedication he had to his younglings! “I-I’ll do it! You can have all of my money! And my three housecats! And my 5 barrels of aged cinnamon whiskey!” Khitti gasped. “Clyde, you have a deal!” But Clyde was to have the last word out of all of this… “But only if you give me the dragon’s head, so that I can have it stuffed and put on the wall above my fireplace.” Yes, Khitti’s bad luck has carried over into this new body.

Brand || It was lucky that Brand was lurking in the doorway and had heard the whole thing. Enough, at least, to know what she needed to do. Clyde would watch in horror as the dragon reached two of its limbs toward its great wide maw -- and then popped its own head off like it was nothing and handed it down to the terrified Clyde.

Brand || "Make it five times your original offer," said the dragon's head, "or else I'll come alive again and eat you in your sleep." And with that, it promptly died. Khitti didn't need to strike a single blow.

Khitti || Clyde shrieked. A lot. Probably more than Khitti’s heard any dude shriek in his lifetime--and that’s including when his village was more or less annihilated. It would be almost comical in nature if Clyde hadn’t also been sobbing hysterically and possibly peed his pants. “Okay! Okay! Five times! Fives times!” Still sobbing, he took the head and went home with his prize. How long the head stayed there when he put it on his wall, well, that all depended on Brand’s magic and whether or not she wanted to be nice and let it stay there for a few days. When it seemed like the coast was clear, Khitti grabbed his wife and kissed her. “That was amazing! I suppose that means we’ve got a lot more time on our hands now...” There’s definitely a bit of eyebrow wiggling going on there. “We could, uh… go get a room somewhere. Let Dozla keep Dominic for the rest of the night. Or the weekend. Or the next two weeks. Or forever.” Look, Khitti loved Dominic, but right now, he just wanted to spend time with his wife and probably do a lot of things that were not safe for innocent ears to hear.

Brand || For five times the already exorbitant sum they were due to get for this job, Brand could put in the extra effort to keep the dragon's head in existence a little longer. She'd probably have to ask Viera for help maintaining the spell, but she could do it. And would it be too much trouble to stage a theft of the dragon's head in a few days, to help explain its eventual disappearance? That, she'd have to think about. She wasn't going to think about it right now, though, because right now she had a very happy husband sweeping her into his arms and proposing a romantic getaway.

Brand || "Perhaps..." she answered him, smirking. "Did you have anywhere in mind? I've been thinking about testing out these new magicks in the bedroom, but..." She paused to give him another kiss. "I don't know how I'd improve on what we already have."

Khitti || “Hmmm,” Khitti said as he thought it over. “We could… go to Frostmaw? It’s been awhile since we’ve been there. I heard they renovated the rooms too. It’s a lot more luxurious than last time. Gonna have to pass on the room that supposedly has a weird statue of Lionel in it though.” Khitti shuddered and kind of threw up in his mouth a little. “And I’m sure we can figure out what to do with your magic when we get there.”

Brand || “Frostmaw… Frostmaw.” Brand tapped a finger to her chin, thinking. It was funny -- she knew they’d been there before, even lived there for a while, but the specifics eluded her. She couldn’t recall any distinct memories from that time, only of the place where they had lived and some other vague, impersonal details. Oh well, it -had- been a while. “Well, yeah, that’s pretty close to here, isn’t it? We can make the trip.” She smooched Khitti again and gestured for him to lead the way.