RP:Troubles With Goodbye

Summary: Lanara invites Meri to breakfast as she has important news to share, and it’s the type of news that leaves one with an ache in their heart. Lanara Banks only has a matter of days to live, and her last hope is of being turned into a lycan, courtesy of Tiber. The psion tends to be careful with her words and mindful of those that are eavesdropping on their conversation, as the witch wears her heart on her sleeve and speaks openly. A lot goes unsaid and the best friends part on uncertain terms, as neither is sure if Lanara will be around for a repeat of a shared meal.

Part of the Lunar Tides and Silver Linings Arc

It’s late morning and Lanara sits on a bench before an expensive eatery in Cenril, clutching a paper bag to her chest as her weary gaze looks over each patron that enters the establishment. Despite the fact that it’s in the upper seventies and everyone is wearing beachwear, the witch is dressed as though she’s soon to be dining in Frostmaw. Clad in a thick pair of wool leggings, a heavy sweatshirt, and a pair of fur lined boots, it’s obvious that she’s dressed for both comfort and warmth. The front strands of her hair have been pulled away from her face and clasped with a claw clip, and she isn’t wearing any makeup or jewelry, save for the hourglass pendant around her neck. Lana penned a letter to Meri a few days prior, and she waits for her best friend to turn the corner, so that she can treat her to a delicious breakfast… And so that she can unveil the secret that she has been keeping for several months. It’s going to be a bittersweet meeting and Lana is a bundle of nerves as she crosses her legs and bunches the bag in her hands. As if the sight of the disheveled witch isn’t enough to raise a red flag, it’s also a rarity to see her without an animal companion, and as of this moment, no pet is in sight.

The invitation to breakfast was received a few days prior and of course Meri was not about to deny Lanara. Arrangements would be made for a babysitter. She knew that Fleur was welcome, but she also knew that toddlers when going out to eat sometimes. Meri rounds the corner, dressed in the same style that she usually is. Black pants, boots, etc. One detail that currently strikes Meri as odd is the fact that Lanara is dressed like it was still winter in Cenril. The absence of a pet was not really a red flag to the blonde, they were going out to breakfast. Not every establishment welcomed animals in their dining spaces, not every customer appreciated it either. That bag that Lanara was clutching though? That also struck Meri as a bit odd. Enough that once the blonde was within earshot of Lanara, she greets the witch with a lifted brow rather than a smile along with the following words, “Heeey. What’s with the outfit? What’s with the bag? I thought we were going out to get some breakfast today. Are you not feeling well?” Meri looks confused, unable to make heads or tails of the current situation. Were they dining in? Were they eating out? She waits for Lanara’s answer.

Lanara looks relieved when she sees the familiar face, clad in her familiar attire, and she greets her best friend with a small smile. She is going to miss Meri, terribly. As she’s asked about the outfit, the bag, and if she’s feeling well, she pauses to look down at herself and assess the situation. She -does- look disheveled and if she were feeling a little better, she surely would have dressed for the occasion and maybe put on a little makeup and make sure she’s presentable for dining out. The witch looks like a bum and she feels like a living corpse, so she holds out the paper bag and mutters an apology, before she pulls herself to her feet and motions for the door. “We are going to get breakfast, I was just getting some air before we go inside.” She will answer the other questions in due time. The pair is led to a table and peruses the menu, Lana orders a glass of juice and some pancakes, as she encourages Meri to order whatever she wants, this is -her- treat. “Thank you again for helping Tiber pull information from Skitch… I brought some goodies in that bag for your new dog.” The cane corso had been freed during the attack on the sleazy man, and Lana is relieved that it has found a good home, plus it would be very protective of Meri and Fleur. If the psion is to peek into the bag, she will find a collar, leash, some training treats, and a few toys. “So… How have you been, Meri?” She’s asking about the situation with Callum, finding a new place to live, the ‘jobs’ her friend takes, and if Fleur is dealing with everything okay. Her dark hues remain on Meri’s fair face as she awaits a reply, always putting others before her own issues, as is the way of the witch.

Lanara should know that Meri is not one to care dreadfully much about appearances, it’s just that in this instance it was not the norm for the witch. Lanara answers that they will be getting breakfast, but there is something about the witch’s words that do not put Meri’s mind at ease. Maybe it was the lack of assurance that Lanara wasn’t sick? Or that something wasn’t wrong? Meri couldn’t quite place her finger on it. The bag is of course accepted and Meri looks inside. Under different circumstances, her smile would be wide and full but in this exact moment she can only show her appreciation with a half-hearted smile. She just can’t shake that nagging feeling. Meri’s breakfast is considerably lighter, so much so that it could hardly be considered a breakfast at all. It seems that all Meri wants is coffee. “Thanks. I am sure that he will love them. We are all still trying to adjust, as I am sure you can imagine. Skitch did quite the number on him.” Meri wrinkles her nose slightly, as she goes on, “Which about sums up how I have been. We’re just all adjusting and trying to take everything day by day.” Even if Meri had been on some exciting jobs (she hadn’t), their setting would mean that she would not be able to speak very liberally of them. “Anyway. What’s new with you? I must say, I was surprised to hear that you and Tiber were having so many troubles with this fellow….” Skitch. Alastor. All of these names were new and unfamiliar to Meri. “Is everything good with it all now?”

All the while that Meri is speaking about adjusting to her new life and taking each thing day by day, Lanara is dreading the moment when the focus would shift to her own life. A life that is fading with each breath she takes. The witch nods sympathetically, because she had to endure heartbreak in the past, and was left to pick up the pieces. Not that her past issues are entirely comparable to the psions, as she had actually been married and has Fleur to look after, along with a few dogs. The comment about Skitch is met with a snort, as Lana lifts her orange juice to her lips and takes a tentative sip, ignoring the plate of pancakes that had been set before her, as her appetite had left her a few days ago. “Skitch is the -worst- and he deserves all the bad karma that life throws at him.” He was the one that tried to sell Lana into slavery, arranged a sick marriage with some old rich man that was into collecting pretty elves, and he’s also the lowlife that had gotten her abducted and manhandled a few weeks prior! “Things are… Betterish.” She lifts a single shoulder in a careless shrug, “Tiber dealt with the ‘situation’ in Venturil and now we have a pack of lycans to look after, until they can adjust to their new lives.” Briefly, she fills Meri in on how Tiber had been forced into lycanthropy by a mad scientist, as an orphan, and how Alastor had been conducting experiments -still- and so they had rescued the other test subjects. “Um… So… Aside from helping Tiber deal with his stuff and planning that fun bachelorette party for Taly, things have been pretty calm.” There’s always a calm before a storm, right? “Are you sure you don’t want anything to eat, or maybe something stronger to drink?” Lana is stalling and Meri will know that something is amiss from the lack of chatter, or the fact that the woman wants alcohol with her breakfast. Wincing, she lowers her gaze to the table, “I have something important to tell you…”

The number of dogs that Meri owned before the divorce and after the divorce is the same, this is because the two that Callum and Meri adopted together were not taken with her. Not by her choice. This is not a detail that Meri has had the heart to tell Lanara, but it is sure to come to light whenever Lanara visits Meri’s home within Cenril. All of these details that Lanara is revealing to the blonde come as a bit of a surprise. Tiber had spent time attempting to fill Meri in on Lanara’s situation with the slavery while Lanara was trying to educate Meri on Tiber’s life and the experimentation that he had been through. These were all such heavy details, so Meri can understand why they might want to keep them to themselves until this moment. Still, realization settles on Meri. Meri might not be an empath nor is she the sort of psion that has any mind reading abilities, yet part of her ‘job’ was to read people. Lanara has never been exempt from that, Meri was doing it right in this moment. She could tell that Lanara was trying to put Meri’s mind at ease and act like this was just your average everyday breakfast, but it wasn’t. It started when Lanara used the word ‘betterish’. And even when Lanara tried to convince Meri that things were mostly quiet? That ‘um...so..’ was throwing the entire sentence off for the blonde. And then Lanara was suggesting she get a stronger drink? Meri saw no reason to conceal her emotions on this matter, she would make it very clearly known that she can tell something was more than a little off by staring at Lanara from across the table with a lifted brow. Lanara has something important to tell her? The blonde answers with a tentative, “I can tell.”

Normally Lanara would blurt out whatever was on her mind, regardless of how the message may be perceived by others, but this is a rather sensitive topic and Meri is one of her best friends, so she had been hoping to ease into the conversation. It’s not going great, as Meri hadn’t ordered breakfast and she keeps looking at Lana as though she knows there are untold truths being held at bay. It’s easier to discuss the life of a single mom, Tiber’s past, and the dogs that had been adopted, because those are neutral topics. “So…” The juice is again raised and the witch is wishing it was a mimosa, but she knows that she can’t keep this secret forever, so she finally caves as her emotional walls come tumbling down. “I’m dying.” Pause. “Remember how I mentioned that I went to Kelvar to free everyone from the plague, which was more of a curse cast by my evil daughter? Well. I purged them of the sickness, however, it had found a new host as I sacrificed -my- life during the spell. There isn’t a cure, I cannot undo what’s been done, nor can I transfer the curse to someone else. The only hope I have is to become a vampire, but I -refuse- to do such a thing.” That’s what had gotten her into this whole mess! “Tiber offered to try and turn me into a lycan, but that’s also iffy, because… My empathic abilities may reject the change, and there isn’t a guarantee that turning me into some other living creature will have any promise.” Lana sadly shrugs and points to the hourglass pendant, “I know I don’t -look- sick, but that’s because of the enchantment that I wear… As you can see, I only have a few days left… So, I wanted to tell you now, to say goodbye, in case I am unable to be saved.” Tears sting her eyes as she focuses on the psion’s pretty face, wondering what sort of reaction she would have, as it had been different with the few others that she had told. Kyori felt guilt, Penelope had made illegal dealings to obtain medicines that would mask the side effects of the curse, Talyara had fallen to pieces and confided in Krice who had then offered to take the curse upon himself, and Tiber had reassured her that lycanthropy would ‘fix’ everything. “I didn’t tell you sooner, because I know that you have been going through a lot with Fleur and the divorce, and because you are my closest friend and I honestly couldn’t bring myself to say the words.”

Was there really any way to ease into this subject? As Meri listens to Lanara, the first expression on her face is one of disbelief. There are several levels to this feeling, the first and most surface layer being that Meri cannot even believe that Lanara was saying these words to her right now. Digging deeper, Meri’s mind cannot help but travel to that ill-fated day in Larket when she watched Valrae burn alive at the stake. Valrae did not stay dead. From Valrae, the blonde’s thoughts move to Khitti, another loved one that she ended up watching burned alive. Khitti did not stay dead. So if Lanara dies? How permanent could her death really be? Why would others have the potential to be brought back from death, but not Lanara? Meri’s reaction is further hindered by the fact that they are in such a public setting. At least one table has actually overheard the current conversation and have taken on to full on eavesdropping, though they are trying their best to pretend that they are paying no mind to the women’s conversation. Still, Meri was a werewolf and she could hear their hushed whispers. Expressing her feelings has always been challenging for Meri, even simple gestures like a hug made her feel….vulnerable? And vulnerable is not a feeling that Meri likes. “Is this some sort of joke?” are the first words that fly out of Meri’s mouth, still not really able to wrap her mind around Lanara confessing that she’ll be dead in a few days. Meri’s gaze slides around the room, specifically landing on the table that has been eavesdropping, because she can hear them whispering about Meri’s reaction. Meri stiffens, not liking being the center of attention, but beyond the glare she tries to ignore the table. There is a long moment of very uncomfortable silence between herself and Lanara and then Meri finally speaks, though the tone of her voice is very guarded. “There is a solution for everything in these lands, a fix for everything, that’s just how it is. You cannot tell me that there is not.” Meri is not even going to address Lanara’s judgement of vampires. “Tiber will try to turn you,” said like Meri thinks it would be foolish for Lanara to not attempt it, “and if that fails then I will have Quintessa bring you back from the dead.” Meri repeats. “There is a cure for everything.”

Lanara’s unaware of any eavesdroppers as her main focus has been trying to confess all that is going wrong in her life to her best friend. A twist of fate had taken center stage in her brain, and she watches as the gears turn in Meri’s head, and as she wonders aloud if this is a sick joke. “If only it was…” The immeasurable silence that rests between the women is an oddity, if only because the witch is often chipper and a chatterbox. Meri has been known for her quick wit and will talk if addressed, but of the two, she’s often the silent type. Right now it’s -beyond- silent, and as Meri is thinking of ways to remedy the situation, Lana is thinking that she has upset her best friend to the point of muteness. Chocolate hues shift to look anywhere but at the psion across the table; a busboy carefully carrying a pyramid of mugs, a waitress taking orders at a table nearby, a little brat pouring salt into the sugar container, and a snooty woman pointing out discrepancies in the bill with a presumed manager. Everyone is going about the hustle and bustle of their days, never knowing which day will be their last, and it’s that finite realization that has Lana returning her attention to Meri. She may never see the woman again, and there is pain in her gaze as Meri responds in a guarded tone, her emotions indecipherable. The mention of being resurrected is like pulling a bandage off too quickly and taking the flesh and hair along in the rip, for the sting that Lana feels has her gaze dropping once more to the untouched pancakes. “I can’t come back from the dead again… I am a Kelvarian Elf, and that means more than just exotic looks, magic, and hailing from a faraway land enshrouded in fog… We are blessed with three lives upon our births… And I have already died on two separate occasions.” There will be no successful resurrection, regardless of Quintessa’s powers, because at her moment of rearing, Lanara had paid a toll to the Goddess. “I am…” Pessimistic. “Optimistic.” She’s referring to Tiber’s plan to turn her into a werewolf. “I’m sorry.” She feels that she should apologize, because Meri seems a bit out of sorts, and she wishes that they didn’t do this in a place so public. The witch thought it best that it not be done near Tiber or Fleur, and since she’s too weak to travel very far, this seemed the safest bet.

Meri does not fully understand the explanation that she is given about Kelvarian elves but the normally curious woman does not pick at that thread. The information that Lanara was leaving her with was just too heavy for Meri to feel comfortable with pressing on with questions to gain understanding. It didn’t really help that Meri’s head was starting to spin, making the task of trying to find just the right words all the more challenging. It’s a challenge that Meri fails at. The woman keeps her eyes locked on her coffee. It might seem like the woman was just watching steam rise, but really her mind was a bit numb and she was at a total loss for words. At one point she opens her mouth to say something but absolutely nothing comes out. Seconds were feeling like minutes to Meri, how long had they been sitting here? How long had she been silent? The blonde wasn’t too sure. The process of her trying to figure out something to say and even going so far as to open her mouth repeats itself once more. It’s finally on the third try that Meri manages to get out the following, “I am sorry...I really...I don’t even know what to say? I am not even sure I am processing this...I thought things were finally going well for you...”

Lanara sees the gears grinding and the emotions that are churning through Meri’s mind, but the psion remains silent for quite some time, much to her dismay. Would Meri miss her, if she truly does end up kicking the bucket? Having known the blonde for quite a few years, and having considered her to be a best friend, Lanara is saddened by the fact that little emotion is being shown. It’s true that Meri isn’t one to wear her heart on her sleeve, and she cannot recall ever seeing the woman shed a tear over anything. Callum had abandoned her and Fleur, and rather than sob into the nearest pitcher of ale, she merely collected her things and found a home elsewhere. Catastrophic occurrences happened over the years, friends were lost, lands were cursed, and relationships had been severed... Yet, Meri still didn’t give into her emotions. Lanara always admired Meri’s resilience to such things from afar, as she often felt things too intensely, whereas her friend could pull herself together and never lose her composure. The psion has a strength that very few possess, and Lana is proud of that fact normally, however, in this moment she needs reassurance and coddling. She knows that if she’s in danger, she can turn to Meri at a moment's notice, and she likewise would do the same. The pair had each other's backs and could maintain secrecy, if the situations called for such, and no task was too dirty or too deadly. But opening up is a gray area for Meri, and Lana drops her gaze to the table and beckons for the check, as it’s clear that this ‘goodbye’ isn’t going as she had hoped. The witch needs to know she matters, that their friendship is solid in life and death, and that if the worst result happens, that she will be remembered. “I really should be getting back to the sanctuary… I have a few things that need tidying up.” As Meri finds her words, she is given a small smile and a nod, “Things were going great before I left, and they are pretty awesome right now… But, I guess you could say that my ‘daughter’ happened to me, and ultimately my fate is twisted with Nat’s.” It’s bittersweet. The only way the woman had gotten to know her estranged daughter was through deception and it had cost them both their lives. “Take care, Meri…” There are questions in Lana’s eyes, but she doesn’t voice them, nor does she cling to the woman and sob on her shoulder. She doesn’t drop the ‘L’ word, or even offer their signature poke and pinch best friend code, because she’s attempting to be as strong as Meri had displayed countless times. A fistful of coins is deposited on the table, beside the plate of untouched pancakes, and Lana swiftly rises and heads for the exit.

While the psion has never been a mind reader, her intuition usually serves her well and in this moment it is telling her that this situation is growing tense. There was something that Meri said or didn’t say, it was obvious to Meri that she did not deliver the conversation that Lanara was hoping to have. What was Lanara hoping to hear from Meri? This was a question that the blonde couldn’t answer, for while Lanara was hoping that certain things would end up validated during this conversation, Meri was stuck working through the early stages of grief: denial, anger, and bargaining. The bits of denial should be obvious, her first statement was inquiring if this was a joke. Bargaining was mixed with denial, why was it that Meri was suggesting that they just bring Lanara back from the dead? Meri’s got friends in low places, or dark places, that all depends on your perspective. Lanara was not going to get the goodbye that she was hoping for, because Meri was not willing to admit that this was even goodbye. There was a solution. So what if Lanara was being clearly pessimistic and trying to explain why she thinks this suggestion or that idea will probably not work. There was a solution. If there was any hope that Lanara was going to see a more emotional version of Meri, that was eliminated when the witch requested and paid for their breakfast bill. A breakfast that remained mostly untouched. Lanara had things to do. Tidying up to take care of. Meri presses her red lips together and answers with a nod, not really willing to meet the witch’s gaze at this exact moment. “...I will see you…” Meri says, trying to sound confident...because there WAS a solution….except Meri sounds anything but confident at this point. Lanara will leave but Meri will stay seated, not budging from her spot until the server comes and hints that it’s time she leaves with a subtle, “Can I take your plates?” At which point Meri will return home to her child.