RP:S1, E13 The Cloud Over You

Summary: Larz makes sure Taly is okay when she didn’t make it to her archery lesson.

=Taly’s Place-

Talyara had made sure that Lanara, Meri, and Encara found treatment for their injuries after their journey for the crystal skull in the Shadow Plane, refusing help herself before ducking out and running blindly into Sage forest. The witch felt like her mind was slowly losing grip with reality so that by the time she fumbled into her her cottage near dawn she was shaking uncontrollably, tears streaming down her cheek. Her head throbbed painfully and there was a dried trickle of blood that had dripped down from her temple where Lana had accidentally beamed her with the boat. Taly’s chest heaved and she couldn’t even bring herself to climb the ladder to her bedroom loft, instead curling up in a ball on her couch, pulling a quilt over her. “I-I j-just n-need t-to s-sleep,” she tells herself with chattering teeth. Unfortunately for Taly, restful sleep would not come for the witch who was plagued by horrific, graphic nightmares. The murder of her mother right in front of her eyes. Her capture and torture by the drow patron. Lana taking her last breath in her arms. Emrith breaking things off with her and saying he loved someone else. The entire thing looped into her brain, exhaustion keeping her under so that she was unable to wake herself. It was well into the afternoon when she finally breaks herself from her half-sleep, crying hysterically and hugging her knees to her chest. So overcome with grief and depression is Talyara that she does not even remember that she was supposed to meet Larz for archery practice.

Largakh only let the appointment run thirty minutes late before he walked the trail to the Rolafir cabin just in case Taly may have tripped on a root and needed help. He grew more and more concerned as he is lead back to the village of Sage without any sign of her. It was then that his brisk walking pace turned into a trot, then a jog until he was full on sprinting until he found her door. He was surprised he remembered it, having only been there once three or four weeks ago. He looked around and for once this area was rather vacant as larz knocked loudy, “Taly?” He pressed his ear up against the wood of her door to use his decent hearing and check if she was inside, but he heard her crying. First things first he checked the perimeter of her place, no danger out her, then he peaked in a window to make sure she wasn’t in some hostage situation, she wasn’t. Simply he would try the door first if it weren’t locked, “Taly? It’s Larz, is everything alright in there?”

Talyara would be able to be seen from the window curled up in the fetal position, hands gripping either side of her head as she tried, helplessly, to block out all the bad thoughts that were plaguing her. “Please stop. Please stop. Please stop. Please stop.” She continued the chant under her breath as tears rolled down her cheek. So consumed was she in her despair that she did not hear Largakh the first time he knocks and calls out to her. If he tries the door he will find its unlocked but she’s heard him this time. “I’m f-fine. G-go a-away,” she calls out before dissolving into uncontrollable sobs.

Largakh would totally break down the door if he was the type, but maybe it was him that did something and she doesn’t want to see him? He was so perplexed and let a moment pass before gently knocking again, attempting to soften his voice a little to coax her, “I am not going to go anywhere… I’ll sleep out here if I have to.” There was an aching in his chest for his friend, “I might get beat up by the city guard out here again.” People would think he’s the reason she’s crying - such a hideous and grotesque orc. “Must I bribe you with sweetbread?” He’s probably horrible failing at this.

Talyara didn't move from her spot initially. She indeed waited a few moments to see if Largakh would leave but he didn't and despite her overwhelming melancholy, fear of him being injured by guards overcame her so that she forced herself to an uneasy stand and opened the door. Taly never considered herself to be pretty (being the younger sister of arguably the most beautiful witch in the realm, the younger sister took a beating to her self esteem); however, her current appearance made her almost unrecognizable. Her clothes were dirtied and bloodied, the wound on her temple leaving a rather unsightly lump. Her normally unruly locks were sticking up in old places from all her tossing and turning. Fresh blood dripped from her palms and arms where the druidic witch had raked her nails against her flesh due to her anxiety. Her normally happy eyes were dull, bloodshot, and puffy, having spent hours weeping even in her nightmare induced half-sleep. "I'm fine," she says again, even though it's clear she's not before she turns on her heel and makes her way back to the couch.

Largakh still smiled at the sight of her. Luckily his pop sent him with a healing kit before he left to go look for Taly, “hey. Want to talk about it?” He took a square pouch out and shook it before pressing the soft patch to her head where the bump was, it was cold to her skin in order to minimize the swelling, “Hold that there.” He brought over a bucket of water and started to rinse the blood gently from her hands, accessing any wounds, “are you hurt anywhere else? If I need to I will bring Theoduin here.” He was trying to meet her gaze as he softly pushed some of her hair out of her face, “how many fingers?” He held up three, making sure she didn’t have a concussion, “do you remember your name?” and “do you remember my name?” lastly, “who did this to you?” A flicker in those tuscan eyes.

Talyara winces slightly when he presses the cloth to the side of her head but doesn't completely pull away. When Largakh asks if she wants to talk about it she doesn't answer right away. What was she supposed to say? Every negative and painful moment is playing in a continuous loop in her mind? That even on her best of days her self esteem was nearly non-existent and today, she could disappear for ever and it would be a welcome release. How she can never live up to her beautiful, badass sister. How she always will live in her shadow and never be good enough. How no one will ever love her the way she wants to be loved. How this world would be better off without her... "No," comes her eventual reply. Taly holds the cloth against her head and allows Larz to wipe the blood from her hands and arms to assess the superficial wounds there and he might notice that the witch is trembling. "No." She wasn't hurt anywhere else, at least physically. "No." She didn't want Theoduin there. Even as Larz prompts her with his question on how many fingers he is holding up she doesn't quite meet his gaze. "Three. " "Talyara." "Larz." "Lanara, unintentionally."

Largakh looked concerned, but he wouldn’t pressure her, “hey… It’s okay.” It seemed like some olympic feat that he was able to soften his orcish tone, “come here...” He sits next to her and put his arm around her so he could hold the cool pack on her head and she can just relax, “I’m here, nothing is going to happen. You’re okay. You don’t need to talk if you don’t want to - I’ve been there.” He tries to keep her talking about anything though, “what mischief have you and Lana got into now?” He tried to sound lighthearted, thinking that if she talked of her beloved sister it would sort of lighten the mood. If she had shrank away from him he would understand that too. “I’m here, Taly.” It’s all he could do with only knowing her for a short time, “can I get you anything at all?”

‘No, it’s not okay,’ Taly thinks to herself as she begins to bounce her leg nervously, although she doesn’t vocalize this to Largakh. She doesn’t shy away when he sits beside her and slings his arm over her shoulders, but this is a very different Taly from the pleasant witch he has gotten to know over the course of the past few weeks. Unfortunately for Largakh, the story of the evening isn’t some fun silly mischief with her sister but rather much darker. “My fault. It’s all my fault. They followed me into the portal. Shadow Plane. Sea monster.” It’s all Taly can get out before she stands up suddenly and begins to pace, feeling like the movement might alleviate some of that anxious energy. Once more her nails rake across her arms causing pinpricks of blood to blossom on her flesh. “For now you are,” she says almost sadly. “But one day you’ll leave me. They all leave me.” Pace. Pace. Pace. If Larz’s half-elf side had any sensitivity to energies he might notice or feel a heavy darkness surrounding Talyara.

Largakh meant it was okay she didn’t want to tell him, but I guess that’s a flaw of being someone of few words. He doesn’t care if she was a mess right now - he met Lanara when she was a mess, distraught over losing a pet. He remains calm, quiet and a pillar of peace, but maybe she could pick up just a sliver of it with what's left of her empath abilities. He lets his arm drop and holds onto the ice pack for her, listened and watched her while his voice stayed low and soft, “the shadow place?” It didn’t sound like a happy place and he let her go on… Being of only moderate intelligence didn’t help with sensing magic or auras, but his grandmother was a holy priestess and she taught him other ways he could sense things like this. “Taly, as long as I am in my right mind I will be there for you. When I care about someone I mean it and you’ve been a good friend - that will never change,” his eyes stayed on her, but not in a way that was unsettling. “I am going to help you, but there is something here which I cannot battle. Will you let me get Seldanna? She can banish whatever is hanging here, I know she can.” She’s ancient - ‘try and mess with my badass grandma, I dare you.’

Talyara continues her incessant pacing and when raking her nails against her arms fails to alleviate her anxiety she moves on to ringing her hands, twisting her fingers this way and that until they were all tangled up. “Everyone says that,” she says in a pained voice. “Everyone says they will never leave me and they do.” Talyara can’t bring herself to look at Largakh because visions of his eventual abandonment are already firing off in her brain; visions of him with other friends, other girls, them all laughing at her. His voice echoing how she was never good enough reverberate inside her skull and it only causes more tears to drip down her cheeks. If the little witch knew she only had a few more painful hours to endure she might be able to weather this storm. However, the anguish is overwhelming and Taly is cracking. Larz’s insistence that he go get Seldanna is met with a firm shake of her head. “No no no. You shouldn’t even be here. No no no.” Pace. Pace. Pace.

Largakh pulls out a canteen of water, “when was the last time you ate or drank?” He offers the cool spring water to her before standing up to stop her pacing only for a second while he takes some glass bottle out of his knapsack and dampens a clean rag, cleaning the scratches on her arms gently, “this might sting a little.” He then wraps her arms up in a thin layer of bandages to she wasn’t able to break skin anymore, “yeah? Well I don’t have many friends, so unless you try to kill me, I am not going anywhere.” He hands her a dry kerchief for her tears, “let it out Taly.” Starting to smooth her hair down, “it’s okay to have these feelings. It validates us as being alive and if you hold all of this in, it will only get worse.” She’s vehemently refusing other help and saying how he shouldn’t be here, “I want to be here. If you really wish me to go I would understand even if I wouldn’t like it.” His easy going demeanor entire shows in his open body language, “I have some food with me. Why don’t you eat? Take a nap, I will be here and make sure nothing bad happens.” He had a feeling that if they just give this time it will pass on it’s own.

Talyara waves away the offer of water. Unbeknownst to Largakh, the witch suffered from an eating disorder which caused her to refuse food and drink in times of stress; this obviously being one of those times. The druidic witch was unaware that she was even tearing at her skin so that when Larz approaches and begins to clean the small cuts she yelps and shrinks away slightly. Still, she doesn't pull away when he moves to wrap her arms up. "You'll see," she says sadly, meeting his eye for the first time with her own darkened, watery ones. "Everyone leaves me," she says in a shaky voice barely above a whisper. "No food," she repeats in the same manner she refuted the water. "I can't sleep. Too many nightmares...." Talyara flops back on the couch and grips the back of her head and rocks back and forth slightly. "I just want this to stop. Please make it stop. Please...death would be better than this," she confesses in another choking sob.

Largakh wasn’t about to force her to do anything she didn’t want to and didn’t judge her for turning food down. He accepts this is not a cookie cutter world and there’s all walks of people in this life, so he puts everything side for her. He stops triggering her by saying he’ll be there for her, it’s time to stop talking the talk and show her. This isn’t running him off even if this is some aura messing with her emotions - he’s an orc and doesn’t scare easy… Unless she was throwing fireballs at him because he doesn’t do well with fire magic. Sitting down next to her he would gently try to get her to lean into him and just try to relax, softly running his hand up and down her back or arm, “Taly, I care about you. Seldanna and Theo care about you. Your sister cares about you.” Saying positive things as if battling the negative energy for her, “I know you are strong. Just remember how it felt to shoot that perfect arrow - it was amazing.” If anything he will just sit there with her and hold her until this passes - he wont eat either or drink until he knows she’s okay.

Talyara is capable of throwing fire balls but she's not a fighter and seeing as Largakh has never given her any reason to hurt him, she of course wouldn't. When his hand first touches her she tenses, out of instinct; however she doesn't pull away and allows him to continue his attempts to soothe her. She doesn't respond when he speaks of all who care about her because in her current state, under the spell of the crystal skull, she cannot believe this to be true. It is the half-orc's final statement, the one about the arrow, that somehow gives her a point to focus on. So she does that and, combined with his rubbing of her back the witch eventually drifts off into another half sleep. Nightmares still plague her and if Larz should stay he would hear or whimper or cry out; however, as time moves on, and the day comes to an end, Taly's nightmares dissipate. Assuming, Larz remains, it is that feeling of someone being near that eventually snaps Taly awake with a small yelp. She blinks a few times, her eyes still swollen and bloodshot and she looks down at her arms in confusion upon seeing the bandages. Slowly, her head turns to see her friend seated beside her. "L-Larz? What are you doing here?"

Largakh didn’t sleep, he made sure to soothe her through every night terror while keeping the cold back on her bump. When she came to he wasted no time in offering her water again while he answered, “I got worried when you didn’t show for archery lessons thinking maybe you were hurt and stranded after tripping over a root, but then I couldn’t find you till I got here. I could see and hear you were in here and troubled so I stayed until I knew you were okay. How are you feeling? Are you still not hungry?” She seemed in her right mind now so he gently takes her hand and starts to unwrap the bandages, “do you remember anything?” He took her chin in his thumb and forefinger to gently turn her head so he can make sure the bump went down. Once the bandages her off he looked at where there were scratches on her arms, there was one faint one left, “I put a salve my grandpa makes on your scratches and it healed them. That last one should go away by tomorrow.”

"Archery practice..." she says slowly, trying to gain her bearings and try to place the day. Taly graciously takes the canteen and drinks from it thirstily before handing it back, nearly half empty. "I missed archery practice," she says with a frown still trying to place the day. And then she remembered her trip to the Shadow Plane the previous night. But no, according to Largakh, that was two nights ago. "I feel foggy," she says squinting her eyes shut as he begins to unravel her bandages and examining her skin. "I remember hitting my head, but I don't remember scratches." Talyara hums thoughtfully. "I remember nightmares. Like continuous nightmares one right after the other. They felt so real. It was so intense..." Talyara closes her eyes as Larz takes her chin in his hand and turns her head to examine the bump. "I'm sorry for anything I said and did while you were here. I...wasn't in the right state of mind. You're a good friend to have stayed and made sure I was okay."

Largakh gives her that crooked smile of his, starting to pack away the healing stuff, but also puts away the food he had ready for her since she skipped the question - must be a sensitive issue so he doesn’t force it. “You weren’t yourself and I wasn’t going anywhere. You were scratching yourself - not horribly, but I covered you up before you did any real damage.” He’s called a good friend and his cheeks feel hot before he softly pulls her in for a long hug, “don’t be sorry. I am just glad I was here to help you. As I said I care about you and so many other people do, too. Never forget that Taly.” He separates, “did you want to share any of these nightmares? Just to get them off your shoulders,” a small shrug as he wasn’t prying, but he just wanted to make sure before it seemed like he was just ignoring any issues.

Talyara appreciates the fact that Largakh isn’t pushing the food issues. Others, even though well intentioned, do it all the time, and it’s never successful and she almost always feels worse about it. The witch wrinkles her nose when Larz informs her she was scratching herself but nods her head in thanks that he had the good sense to create a barrier for her skin. Then she’s pulled into a long hug with only takes a moment to return and she pulls her eyes shut. While she appreciates his words of comfort there’s a small nagging feeling in her heart, that she is very much replaceable. It was always there but the skull’s magic had somehow magnified and manipulated it. Should she tell him of her nightmares? Would he use them against her? That question brings on a wave of guilt so strong that she physically shudders. No, Larz is a good friend who stayed with you during this...episode. “Every horrible thing that has ever happened to me replayed in my head like a loop. My mother’s murder. My torture. Lanara’s death. My possession. The truth about my real father. Emrith....Emrith breaking my heart over and over and over again...” Taly reaches up to brush a silent tear from her cheek. “And then glimpses into a horrible future. Lanara saying she was ashamed to be my sister because I was so pathetic. You finding other friends and laughing at me. Krice disappearing. Spending the rest of my life alone...”

Largakh stays, released their hug and softly rubbed her back with one hand. Those tuscan eyes resting on her face, only listening and a comfortable silence grows between them, “it is a tough task trying to shake those nightmares.” He knows all about nightmares and what scares him about them is what he could do to others, becoming a monster. “I cannot even imagine what you’ve been through because you’ve been through some real life nightmares,” he hands her a kerchief for her tears after softly dabbing the one from her cheek. “You will never be pathetic in my eyes and I don’t think your sister ever would be,” a slight smile starts to pull at his lips. “And me? You have nightmares of me and your first thought is not even of me turning all orc evil. I am honored to be your friend - I do not have many and when I introduce you to them I will more than likely be rolling my eyes at how they will flirt with you.” He knows not of the others she speaks of and at the end he finishes, “I may not live as long as you will, but if I am alive you will not be alone, Taly. I see you truly when you shoot with the bow. You feel happy and powerful, like any of those negative feelings you bury are let go and soaring with the arrow.” These are his only bits of encouragement or advice, “is that all?” If she wished to talk more he would gladly stay, but if she declined he would softly ask, “is there anything else you need?”

Talyara takes the kerchief and gently dabs at her eyes to catch any remaining tears before releasing a breathy chuckle. “Of course I wouldn’t think that about you. You’re one of the kindest people I know.” When Largakh mentions her being introduced to his friends and them flirting with her she gives a roll of her eyes but makes no audible comment. She gives Larz a sad sort of smile when he attempts to give her a pep talk. She doesn’t know how to say it’s not alone she feels, but lonely and the two are very different. She’s far from that powerful girl behind the bow but rather weak and pathetic. She doesn’t know how to say any of those things so she gives a slight nod of her head and hands him the kerchief back. “No that’s it. I’m fine. Thank you for checking in and staying.”