RP:Groomsmen Dance Rehersal

Summary: Sargaso invites Meri to practice 'the dance' for Hudson's wedding and Meri drags Lita along.

Barn

Sargaso ‘rented’ out the barn, aka he cashed in a favor that the animal merchant owed him from way back. That’s the main currency of this part of town. Who you know, who you owe. Sarge had malready gone over the groomsmen dance with Fitz and Huds. He wasn’t sure who Brand was or how to contact him, and Huds said he’d handle him then gave Sarge Meri’s contact info to set up a time to practice her part in this. Huds also warned Sarge not to hit on Meri. Don’t make things weird. This warning alerted Sarge to the fact that Meri must be hot, and so he got his hair cut before the rehearsal, not after, shaved, slapped on Hollow’s version of AXE, and wore the shirt that best accentuated the muscles he earned working the docks for over a decade. Four chairs are lined in the middle of the room. On the two end seats: two black fedoras, suspenders that cross in the back and are the same color as the bridesmaid dresses, and two pairs of all black, cheap sunglasses. For music, Huds let Sarge borrow a magical music box, pre-enchanted with three songs: Hollow’s version of ‘I’m Too Sexy,’ ‘Uptown Funk,’ and ‘SHOTS!’

Meri has been summoned, but she evidently did not see fit to suffer through this rehearsal alone...and she will probably be suffering a little bit because no shots have been done yet. She agreed to do this thing under stipulations that she be beyond a little drunk, unspoken of course. It was probably just some silent understanding between Hudson and Meri that whiskey needs to be at this wedding, not just the foo-foo champagne stuff. Her bringing a guest to this rehearsal is probably not going to be dreadfully frowned upon. Lita is hot too. Oh Selene help you, Sargaso! Which one to hit on! The tattooed blonde or the raven-haired woman who is also tattooed, just not nearly to the extent to Meri. Anyway, Lita is here because she is Meri's emotional support/the woman who gets to make fun of these two for being completely ridiculous with this dance. "Hey," is the greeting Sargaso gets along with a quick appraisal. "I brought a friend. She is going to the wedding too. Her name is Lita. I hope this is cool." When is it not cool that hot girl a brings along another hot girl? Geez.

Lita feels a little like she's been drug along as a chaperone or a third wheel. Great, thanks. Insert eye roll here. But 'it'll be fun!' Meri had said and 'Pleeeeaaase' and who could say No to that woman and mean it? I mean really, this is a question that needs an answer. Lita was only tagging along to score some Good Will points with the blonde, thinking that maybe that way she might get some answers about all that Tension going on between Meri and Cal. She hadn't asked yet. Without whiskey she'd need to butter her up first. This seemed appropriate enough. Lita took one look at the chairs and then Sargaso, dark eyes giving him a once-over and not bothering to hide the judgement there. But there was a smile on her lips so it might have been a little playful. She lifted her hand, wriggled her fingers in a little wave as Meri made introductions. She should probably be more excited about getting a sneak peak at secret wedding stuff. Mostly she was a little dissappointed that she wouldn't get to see Meri in one of those annoyingly frilly, ridiculously pink bridesmaid dresses.

Which one to hit on? Whynotbothmeme.gif Though, even if Lita weren’t hot, Sarge would be cool. Her hotness is a serendipitous coincidence, not a requirement. “Yo,” Sarge says, getting up from a chair and extending a hand to Meri, then Lita. “Sarge,” he says to both of them. “Totally cool.” He doesn’t look them up and down like some scrub, but still manages to check them out with a head-to-toe onceover in his peripheral vision, without his eye movements giving him away, like a ventriloquist who speaks without moving his lips. Though the two skills may at a blush seem very different, both ultimately have the goal of ending up with a doll on your knee. To Meri, “So I don’t know how much Huds has told you. We’re keeping it short. He tell you the songs?” He grins wryly, pleased with the terrible song choices as he cycles through the opening rifts of cheesy party music typically reserved for booze cruises. That’s part of the fun, isn’t it? Grown men (+ Meri) dancing somewhat earnestly for their humiliation and the crowd’s pleasure. He watches the ladies’ facial expressions to judge the quality of his song choices by their embarrassed wincing. Yea. That’s what we’re doing. His brows lift twice to tease them.

Meri does not know a Cal right now. She might know of a Cal-[vin]...but any other Cal is not going to register in that brain of hers. Out of sight, out of mind, and today was not a day to be glum and mopey. "I got demoted from bridesmaid." This was not true, she is spinning and stretching this tale just a little bit. "I wanted to plan a bachlorette party for Alvina where Khitti bakes a cake in the shape of a peen and everything but..." Demoted. That is her story and she is sticking too it. These words are meant for Lita, as if Meri could somehow sense the fact that she was disappointed that Meri was not going to be tormented with some classicly hideous bridesmaids dress. This is said with a proud grin which might reveal just why she is not actually wincing over the song choice. "Huds? Give details? We are talking about the same wolf, right? No, he really just said that I was going to be on his side of things." Blue eyes travel to Lita again, sharing a playful grin with the teasing woman, "You are still going to dance with me even though I won't be all dolled up in a pretty pink dress right?" A wink, gaze cutting back to Sargaso. "So do you have this thing all choreographed out already? I mean I hope so. I hope you didn't need help planning this dance....Maybe Lita can help us out with a few moves if we need some input." Meri said this would be fun, cooome on Lita.

Lita is mostly unaware of this Hotness Scale that Meri and Sarge seem to basing their judgments off of. Liking people for her was more a black and white affair, do or don't. There was rarely an inbetween. Lita nodded in understanding at Meri's tale about having been demoted from bridesmaid status. Didn't believe it for a second but she'd let it slide, still trying to rack up those Good Will points and what not. "Like Alvina wants you struttin' down the aisle in any dress before her. She could stick you in a potato sack and you'd turn heads." She leaned sideways a bit to brush the blonde's shoulder with an affectionate touch and gave her a playful wink. "'Least Huds was on your side." Switching her over to playing groomswoman and what not. "And yeah, I guess I'll dance with you. Despite the fact that you insist on ditching me for yet another boy." She gave the woman a little pout and brushed loose raven curls past her shoulder as conversation turned back towards Sarge and the choreography. The song choices were acceptably cringe-worthy and secretly delicious which made them perfect. "Don't rope me into this fiasco, I'm here to watch and make fun of, don't mind me."

Sargaso steers clear of talk of bridesmaid demotions and head-turning and jealousy. Women drama, a thorny thicket he shall not touch. Then Lita brushes Meri’s hair affectionately. Hmm… Then Meri asks Lita to dance with her, and Sarge briefly wonders if Huds told him not to hit on Meri because she’s a lesbian, and Lita is her girlfriend? Lita is pouting about a boy, but is that a real thing or like…? Ok, but like, what type of lesbians are these? Like, lesbian-lesbian, like no dicks, no matter what, or like “lesbian” lesbian, like, maybe he can get in there one night or something. He shall investigate this further. “Yea, I got the routine. So, before the dance—Wait, will you be wearing a full suit with suspenders like the rest of us?” Answer yes: award 1 point to the lesbian-lesbian case. Answer no: award 1 point to the “lesbian” lesbian case. “Ok, so, I’ll make sure everyone has their suspenders on. Then, I’ll break up the party, ask for everyone’s attention, and announce that Huds has a surprise for Alvina, she gets seated in the front. Then ‘I’m Too Sexy’ will play. Huds will come out wearing a silver hat, sunglasses, and start lip-syncing the opening but, dancing sexy or whatever. As he does that, we line up with our chairs behind him, wearing sunglasses and black hats. Then when this part kicks in,” the drum riff, “We all jump in line behind Huds, and there’s a short choreography for only half the song. Song fades out, Uptown Funk comes on. This is the big one, the whole song.” It has a chair flip stunt, so, watch out. It’s the golden rule of groomsmen dance. IF you have a groomsman who can do a flip, THEN you MUST make the guy flip. Repeat for every groomsman who can do a flip. “Can you do a flip?” Answer no: award 1 point to lesbian-lesbian, never took gymnastics. Answer yes: award 1 point to “lesbian” lesbian, gymnastics girl. “After Uptown Funk, Shots comes on, we line up each holding a shot and strut up to Alvina, Huds last, do a fake strip tease, nothing crazy, and give Alvina a shot from each of us. But it’s quarter shots with this girly strawberry syrupe thing. You know it?” Answer yes: award 1 point to “lesbian” lesbian case. Answer no: award 1 point to lesbian-lesbian case. “Anyway, we don’t want to trash her. And then we start giving out full shots to the crowd and get people back on the dancefloor for the rest of the song.”

Meri flashes Lita a warm smile at the brief affectionate display. Does this further fuel lesbian thoughts? Maybe. Does Meri care? Probably not. Frankly it is probably a good thing that she is not the sort of psion that can read minds or else she would have to be the worst and would just end up throwing more lumber on that fire. Sorry Lita. This point tally is probably going to break rather oddly for Meri, the woman is hardly the most feminine of chicks. Lita definitely looked more girly than her. Is she going to wear a full suit? "No, Alvina and I settled on a swanky dress suit number." Meaning she will be wearing a skirt, not pants and a blazer of some sort so that she fits the 'theme' of the groomside. o Lita, "The boy is named Luke. He is surprisingly into it. Edgy he says." Dresses/skirts may be acceptable in Meri's book if she ends up looking like a hottie from the mafia who may be ready to crack some skulls in. So she is still in some sort of dress but it is not pink, nor will it be nearly as fancy as what she wore to the coronation. "Suspenders and the hats should work for it..." Skipping to the third question, talk of that strawberry syrup malarky is meant with a wrinkle of her nose. "I am familiar." And she would not drink it. "Lita and I both are whiskey gals." It is not a problem, they are not alcoholics. "As for the flip....I think I need a demonstration before I can give an informed answer." Another look to Lita, "I mean really if he wants to know if I can do it then he can at least show off a little for us."

Lita doesn't bring up her ex-wife in casual conversation. Ever. Better not to. Though she might have just for fun, had she been privy to Sarge's little test as to her relationship status with Meri. Status: It's Complicated (but in a good way). Lita steers away from Meri and Sarge to find a seat out of the way to watch the party. She's a little okay with this random guy trying not to hit on her business partner and friend. She's okay with most anything that makes the blonde smile and she knows Meri can take care of herself in any case. Description of Meri's groomswoman outfit makes her loft a brow at the fellow tattoo artist. Hello, hawtness. She was suddenly a lot more jealous of this Luke character and she rolled her eyes at mention of the boy's name. "Edgy he says," she mocked in good spirits. "Of course he says thinks like 'edgy'." She was mostly teasing, affectionately. She wrinkles her nose almost in tandem with Meri at mention of that strawberry-syrupy-girly mess. Meri's explanation that they are both 'whiskey gals' earns her a wink. It was refreshing to have at least one kindred spirit on the island who didn't drink rum. Lita could tell Meri was yanking this kid's chain by egging him into a demonstration of fancy flips. "Speak for yourself," she drawls, "I could take 'im." In the dress. And barefoot.

Sargaso doesn’t get a straight yes or no to his probing lesbian questions, but reads into Meri’s answers (with some bias), adds that to this anecdote about ‘Luke’, and concludes that she is a “lesbian” lesbian. Score. “Well, if you can’t get the suspenders fixed on the dress, that’s fine. You’re the only girl so it makes sense if your clothes is different.” He grins at Meri’s taunting, also feels his chain has been yanked and he’s fine with it, happy to oblige. “Alright. So, there’s a part in Uptown Funk where each of us steps forward and does one signature move. I’m doing a back flip off my chair, but it can be any type of flip, or a split.” He explains this as he searches the right spot in the song using magical knobs on the box. “Can you do a split?” He’s very keen on the answer for reasons Meri and Lita can surely guess at. “Like a front-back one, or a side-to-side one, the girl one?” At Lita’s taunting, he agrees good-naturedly. “No doubt you can. Bet you can teach me a thing or two.” He winks, then listens to the chorus. “Ok the part is coming up.” He walks over to a chair on the end and points to where he thinks Alvina will be. “So she’ll be there right. So you go up before me, you do your move, then” He jumps onto the chair, then does a backflip diagonally to land a few feet before where the bride will be. He doesn’t look the least bit winded. The chair rocks a little from the stunt, but doesn’t slide around or topple over, suggesting a mastery of the move. To Meri, “But you can do whatever you want for your move. Maybe a lift? I can lift you up or something?”

Meri has not been accused of being a thieving siren she-devil for no reason, she is in fine form today too. Meri bobs her head in a nod of agreement with Lita, absolutely no hesitation. No comment for now, Sarge is given room to give his demonstration and explain how the dance will play out. Meri is actually paying attention to this, if she is going to make a drunken fool out of herself she can maybe she not be the one who is horribly off-beat and fumbling with all the moves. That should be Brand (Dominic). A golf clap for Sarge when he successfully lands that backflip, but Meri had a suspicion this would be no problem. Her approval of his success is tempered because of the suggestions he coughs up for Meri. "Oh you could. I am thinking that I may need a demonstration of that too. What with this guy going on with splits and lifts. I think he just wants a reason to look up some skirts." A grin is sent Lita's direction following her statement to the vampire but does that grin does end with her, Sarge is flashed the very same one. "There is no way in hell I am doing the splits in a skirt. Like what..." In Meri's mind, with the pencil skirt she will be wearing, it will rip. It will rip and she will be that woman flashing the whole party. Some perhaps would approve of this humiliating moment for Meri, if only to catch a glimpse but naw. Meri is good. "I can do the flip. I will do the flip." But Meri does not jump up to demonstrate this. "Maybe we can work in a lift but I mean...I thought this was supposed to be the groomsmen's dance. A lift sounds a little feminine."

Lita is wishing she would have brought snacks. Especially since she was watching a show. Thanks again, Meri. Lita finds Sarge's suggestion that Meri might be able to do a 'girl split' a little offensive and narrows dark eyes a bit at him, judging him a little for that comment. She's waiting for Meri to break out into some version of 'Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better', already smiling to herself at the scene in her head. Lita is not imagining Meri in a pencil skirt though, more like a black pleaded schoolgirl-ish number with buttons in the front? Maybe a little longer with pinstripes and some frills? She's scrolling through fashion ideas in her head, though she'd likely never admit this out loud. "Guys only look up the skirts they can't get under." The comment is out of her mouth before she has time to think about and then she's looking at the other two a little sheepish like yeah, that just happened. She shrugs bare shoulders a little at Meri as the woman is appalled by the idea of a lift. "Don't know, a lift could be done right and not be so feminine," she sneers the word playfully at Meri's distaste. "You're the only girl for the numbers, your part should be a little different." Especially if she was wearing some pencil skirt get-up. "Assuming you're gonna need to move the chairs anyway for the last song, let the boys do their flips and move their chairs out of the way, you standing on your chair so the attention's on you for a second and not the guys moving props-" cause duh. She slid from her seat, realizing it would be easier to demonstrate with Meri than explain in words. "Impressive doesn't have to be flashy." She reached for Meri's hand and tugged the blonde to stand on the nearest chair. Four chairs meant she didn't know the fourth groomsperson, assuming one of these performers would be Hudson. "Sarge and other-guy-who's-not-the-groom do their fancy flippy tricks, swipe their chairs while you're moving here," she motions to the woman's feet in the chair. "You step up on the back of the chair but keep your weight on your back foot and Sarge and Other-Guy come back to the center and kneel on either of the chair to keep it stable. Hudson is back here," she motions to the space behind Meri. "You step up onto the back of your chair, Hudson is crouched down, he tugs the chair out from under you, you hold your arms out and Sarge and Other-Guy-" she should probably ask his name "-catch you, lower you slowly to the ground. All three take a step back, Hudson is now using your chair to do some fancy front flip over you and is standing facing Alvina. Brings the groom back to the center of attention and means you'll need one less chair to trip over on the dance floor." She's still got a hold of Meri's hand as she's explaining the scene that's in her head and she looks up to see what Meri thinks of it all.

Sargaso feigns offense when Meri jokingly accuses him of wanting to look up skirts. “I only look up skirts I’m invited to look up, miss. I’m a gentleman like that.” He ignores Lita’s rude quip as she seems to instantly regret it. Why make her feel bad about it? Who hasn’t put their foot in their mouth. Sarge doesn’t know what a pencil skirt is or the logistics of dresses and splits. A skirt’s a skirt’s a skirt to him. “Well, you can do a funny pose in the lift. It’s more for fun and jokes, you know?” Lita helps him out with her suggestions and he nods several times. “Yea, exactly.” Fitz isn’t doing a flip, and Sarge can’t be sure about Brand, but it doesn’t matter. Lita’s point stands. Boy do their moves, then turn to Meri and catch her trust fall. “I don’t know if Huds can do a forward flip. We can ask. If not, he can do some other move to get out from behind the chair, yea. That still works.” He looks to see if Meri likes it, not particularly bothered one way or the other.

Meri there is a smirk for Sargaso in light is his comment but Meri does not have the chance to respond because she is suddenly wondering whose team Lita is on. Lita! What happened to those good will points you wanted! Like all of those points you were just trying to rack up? Torched. On fire. Nothing but ash. The point stands -- she is the only girl in this whole dance so she may as well milk it and have some different moves. It is not every damn day that a woman actually makes groomside and gets to participate in the hilarity of the dance (this is an honor? Maybe? Potentially? Depending on perspective?) And so with this thought in the back of her mind, Meri let's Lita torment her by positioning her as she sees fit. Up on the chair. Stand like this. Do that. Trust fall. The trust fall is not practiced, there is not a second person in the ready to catch her but the point is made. This is the love that she has for Hudson and Alvina! "Fiiiine, Okay. We can make that work." To humiliate the bride of course, it was her special day and Meri would not be the soursport to did not want to have fun and play. "We can do the falling chair lift...thing." Whatever you want to call it, maybe if Meri was better at being feminine she could define these moves. To Sargaso, "So much for Lita sitting back and watching, eh? Woman basically just planned the finale. I knew there was a reason I brought her along."

Sargaso grins at both ladies when Meri ribs Lita for her meddling. “I’m glad you did. It’ll be great.” Lita swats at Meri and Sarge thinks this might get sexy any minute now. He could stand back and watch, but the wedding is tonight. So instead, he teaches Meri the simple choreography for the two first songs, and explains the line up during ‘Shots!’ Once she’s got it, he turns down the music and starts wrapping things up to go handle his business before the wedding: pick up Mom, pick up Amy (you ladies will be in for a treat), pick up tux, pick up rings. Basically, a best man is a gopher on the wedding day. As he’s packing up the hats and glasses, he strikes up a more casual conversation. “Where do you ladies get your tattoes done?”

Meri is totally fine with that 'play nice' swat, it does earn Lita a devilish grin as a result. What is this word? Nice? Once upon a time maybe Meri had an understanding of the meaning of this word. Maybe one day she will locate a dictionary and look it up again....only to promptly forget it. Sassy and ill-mannered was so much more fun. Who wants to be a good girl? Not Meri. For a time Meri works with Sargaso on practicing those moves -- the shots song is her favorite. Talk about giving a woman some inspiration to some wedding pregaming....And so as Sargaso starts to pack up the stuff Meri begins to run down her own mental check list for the wedding. It is much easier: get dressed up, look hot, meet boy at his apartment. If Amy is anything like Luke's Sarah....oh geez. Sargaso may need to bro out with Luke over their women. Okay, Sarah is not his woman (she just wants to be) and Luke would not approve of Meri even thinking that thought. "Lita and I both work out at a parlor in Rynvale. Well she owns the place and I really just work there. So if you ever want some ink, you know two of the hottest artists in the lands." A wink. "Anyway, wedding is right around the corner? This is where I fuss about how I need to go get dressed and do my hair and put on my face and wahwahwah...So, see you two in a couple of hours?" Goodbyes pending, Meri would be on her way.

Lita eases back away from the other two, back to her seat, as Sarge walks Meri through the dances for the songs. Her plans in getting ready for this wedding shindig are nowhere near elaborate. She's not entirely convinced she's attending and if she does, it'll likely be to lurk somewhere in the back and cut out early. But then, the bride wasn't exactly her biggest fan, last she checked. She'd only be going because she was still mostly friends with Hudson. Sarge was packing up to leave and Meri was answering that question about their tattoos. "Don't worry, we do temporary tattoos as well, if you're afraid of needles or worried the pain might be too much for you." She offered him a playful wink and waved at Meri as she headed out. "Guess that's cue. Good luck on the dance tonight." See, she can be nice sometimes, despite Meri's influence. She'd wave at Sarge and head out as well.

Sargaso looks impressed with their status as tattoo artists. “Oh yea? Been thinking of getting something.” He chuckles at Lita’s comment and raises his shirt to show off his one tattoo (and totally ripped bod, yeaaaaa). On his side, from ribs to hips, there’s a two-tone, deep navy and deep aquamarine portrait of the goddess of the sea. Beneath his shirt he dons a thin, discreet golden chain with a fish loop on it (think Jesus fish, but for Selene). “I’ve always been close to the sea.” And is clearly not afraid of needles. “Take care, ladies. I’ll see you later.” He lifts a work-callused hand in a stiff wave.